BOTTLEDWEHR

*Sigh*, it seems that you have met a horrible demise my friend. But uh, you know, these...these things happen and...and life...life goes on. N-not for you, obviously, uh, you're dead, but uh, it reminds me of a time I was having a conversation with my friend Orville. We were, uh, where were we? We were by the...the river, we were sitting by the river and watching the fish leap over the falls and uh, I said to Orville 'You know, sometimes I feel like a fish leaping over and over again, always trying to get somewhere. Though, I don't know where only to find myself in the jaws of a beast.' He, of course, looked at me surprised, you know? 'Have you been in the jaws of a beast, friend?' To which I said, 'No, of course not Orville'. I said, 'No no no, I...I simply meant that life can seem like a relentless endeavor to overcome meaningless obstacles, only to meet an equally meaningless fate regardless of your efforts, regardless of the obstacles you passed. And, uh, Orville he...he stood and proceeded to drape me with a picnic cloth, to which I...I asked him, I said, 'Friend, what...what are ya doin?' He looked at me very concerned really. 'I feel like you've gotten too much sun'. Indeed, heh, indeed I had. He proceeded to pour me a glass of just...ice cold lemonade. Ooh, you ever mix it with iced tea? Ya do, like...half lemonade ha...ooh, you should try it so--well, you can't, because your dead, but, anyways, so you may be asking yourself, 'How did I go from sitting by the falls and drinking lemonade to being wedged in the air duct, not only with Orville, but with an entire assortment of fruity-colored friends?' Well, there's uh...there's really no good answer to that, but...perhaps I met a demise of my own at some point and...this is my afterlife or my dream or whatever it might mean, I...I honestly don't know. Or...maybe it doesn't mean anything at all. Maybe it doesn't mean anything at all...